Tuesday, July 10, 2007

For the selective shoplifter

If you ever plan on going on a shoplifting spree, learn a lesson from Steve Napier, of Berea, one of Richmond, KY's suburbs. Actually, learn a few lessons, and then decided to do things differently than he did.

Over the past two weeks, Napier allegedly robbed a Wal-Mart, taking away an LCD television set, and two different eMachine computers. He tried a fourth time, looking to score an air conditioner, but was forced to leave empty-handed. A loss-prevention officer reported the attempted theft to the Richmond Police, only to discover that Napier had just been placed under arrest for stealing from a Kroger's supermarket.

So that would be the first lesson. When you've gotten away from a Wal-Mart, admittedly without the items you were hoping to get, maybe it's just a good idea to head home. Don't decide that you really need groceries, obtained in the same way that you got your television. After all, it's not easy to run when pushing a full grocery cart.

The real fun began when the police looked at Napier's mug shot. In the shot, Napier was wearing a Dale Earnhardt t-shirt. In fact, it was the exact same t-shirt he was wearing when he had stolen the television from Wal-Mart in the first place.

And that would be lesson number two. If you really want to keep shoplifting from different places, perhaps the first thing you grab should be a change of clothes. Because there's nothing more embarassing than getting busted for a later crime, only to be found wearing the exact same clothes as you had worn while getting away with your first crime.

Of course, if you're the kind of person who's prone to wearing Dale Earnhardt t-shirts and shoplifting from Wal-Mart, especially to support your Oxycontin addiction, then you're most likely not reading this blog. You're probably trying to figure out why more retailers don't feature the brilliant store layout of children's toys next to firearms next to children's bikes.

No comments: