Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Brought to you by the letter "Duh"

Apparently, there really is almost nothing left of value to study. Why do we say that? Well, honestly, it's because of two separate studies who's results were shown today. While the two studies were vastly different in their subject matters, they bore strong resemblances to each other with regards to a lack of overall worthwhile analysis.

Don't believe us? Well, that's more than fine. Be skeptical. In fact, if you hold some level of skepticism, then it's possible that fewer studies such as these will be conducted. But, for those of you wondering just what we're talking about, let's just lay them out on the table.

According to researchers, men tend to date because of physical looks, and rock stars are more likely to die early. Frankly, with those ground-breaking discoveries, we're somewhat shocked that they didn't combine their research, to prove that male rock stars are prone to dying early after having dated on sheer physical attraction.

A secondary portion to the dating study showed that, while people will state certain preferences, they won't necessarily follow them. Oh, and here's another shocker from the research. Women are apparently aware of their own attractiveness, especially how it relates to the men they might be pursuing.

Ultimately, when we see that two studies such as these are being performed, we really have to wonder about what else could possibly be getting done with that kind of money. After all, is it more important to find out that a career path with easy access to drugs and alcohol leads to early death, or should we spend time wondering why peanut butter and chocolate is such a popular combination? Do we need to be reminded that men are fairly shallow in their dating preferences, or could we maybe be finding out which leg of the pants people generally put on first? Really, who decides which inane question is the most important to be answered?

Now, if you don't mind us, we've got an intensive study going on as to how people tie their shoelaces.

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