Thursday, February 28, 2008

Whatever happened to casing the joint?

Always remember, if you're serious about trying to become a criminal, and want to start with a robbery, make sure you do a little research beforehand. Otherwise, you could find yourself in the dire predicament that a couple of Australian thieves got into this week.

In our minds, this is how we imagine the exchange must have gone:

(Two machete-wielding, balaclava-wearing burglars burst into bar.)

BURGLAR 1: Get on the ground and give us your money!

(Interior door opens, leading to room packed with bikers).

BURGLAR 2: So, Paul Hogan's a great actor, huh?

After all, when you find that you've decided to rob a bar in the middle of a motorcycle gang's weekly meeting, wouldn't you change tune pretty quickly? The thieves did make an attempt to escape, but one was tackled and hogtied before the police arrived, and his accomplice didn't elude capture for long. Needless to say, the bikers themselves have said that the thieves picked the wrong night for a burglary.

Look, we don't give these little tips out because we're trying to encourage a life of crime from anyone. Sure, we do use criminals as some of our examples, but that's because it's generally easier to find crooks doing something foolhardy. So, in whatever your chosen field, please, take one piece of advice from us today.

Look around you, and try to plan ahead. It might help you avoid getting gang tackled.

Unless, y'know, that's the kind of thing that you're into.

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